Almost complete

And nothing is ever so moving than having her as my best friend again. I'm glad that 2011 brought us back together. I hope from now on, I won't disappoint you. I miss you, my best friend.

FLAWS

I still remembered how Farhan would say this:

 " You = Rare :) "

Frankly, I'm not even worth a rare gem. I have my reasons. Real concrete reasons. I came to realize that the reasons why I got hurt is because I've hurt too many people. And these are the people whom I loved and loved me. I broke too many hearts.

Not realizing my mistakes, my friendship with my best friend in poly went down the drain, my once really happy relationship with HY came crashing like glass that has been tampered with and the distance that grew between me and my dearest aunts. Sometimes, I ridiculously wished that in life there could be play/pause and rewind buttons so that I could turn back time, correct my mistakes and mend the crack in every friendship/relationship. But sadly, these things don't exist. 2010 has provided me with so many wonderful memories and valuable insights. I hope I could be a better person in 2011. Bless me, dear Allah. Amin.

I wish I could pause the moments when there was me and you. I missed you.

The Peculiar And Zany

Despite knowing her for more than four years, I have never gotten close to her, This is perhaps, the first time ever. I hope our friendship will stay this way for as long as it can.

A decade old

We've made it this far. And I'm so happy to have you here, for more than a decade. Thanks bestf, for believing in me ♥

PILLAR OF STRENGTH ♥

These are the people that, in some way or another, teaches me the beauty that lies behind every misery. I can't thank them enough for being constantly being there for me especially my family. I hope you people will always be there in my life. xoxo.

p.s I'll always be there for you guys too. ♥

My Daddy Is My New Best friend

The night before, I got my Dad questioning as I returned home from school half and hour after midnight. I was rather shocked when he asked "Did you have an argument with the both of your aunts?" I said nothing and brisked to my room where my whole world came crashing down again. How did my Dad got to know about this?

This morning I woke up in tears. The feeling of being so empty and lost haunts me. Even in my sleep. I couldn't seem to rest peacefully yesterday. Every now and then I woke up tearing. This feeling sucks. I knew I lost him, but I do not want to lose anything or anyone anymore. Especially both of my aunts. I grew up in the hands of people I love the most. And I'm aware that I disappointed them in many ways.

This, is in fact the worst break up ever. I got a tiff with my aunts. I did not show up at Granddad's 40th day death ceremony. My family's disappointed with me. I knew Granddad's disappointed too. After all, I was his most doting granddaughter. 

My Dad came into my room when I was deep in my thoughts. He sat on the bed where I was lying. And then, rubbed my hands and told me... 

"My beautiful daughter, I know you're hurt and I don't want to see you like this. I know your boyfriend left you and you're not in good terms with your aunts because of this. I know your aunts may be harsh on you, but just so you know they love you just like both your mum and I do. It's okay to cry. It doesn't make you any weaker. I know my daughter is a very strong girl. I know my daughter can handle this. Remember this, there are many fishes in the ocean. One, is definitely for you. But just not him. I'll become your best friend okay, so you can tell me everything you want to, even if it's about boys. I'll listen."

And with that I burst into tears again as I realized that I still have people who cared about me and is constantly there for me. My Dad. My family and the best circle of friends. I promise I'll be a strong girl. I love you people with the whole of my heart.

p.s I'm sorry my dearest Granddad. You'll always be in my prayers.

my people

I couldn't thank Allah enough for these people that stood by me through the good and bad times. I realized that my family and best friends were the ones who stick through thick and thin with me. They were the ones who laughed at the stupidest of my jokes and would cry with me regardless I'm happy or sad. I appreciate how they were constantly there for me. Motivating, encouraging, loving and keeping the faith in me. I love you people and I can't bear to lose you people. Thanks Allah for the existence of these people in my life.

Melancholy

It is true that I am facing one of the toughest times of my life. My doting grandfather passed away just about a  month ago. My relationship with boyfriend is on the rocks. My friendship with my best friend, Seri Lee is getting pretty distant. Sighh.

For the past month, I've been drowning in misery. I've been turning my friends down, especially Seri. I just wanted time alone. I mean, time alone with a friend. Not with the boyfriend. That's all I need. If not, I just prefer to be alone. Just alone.

I'm sorry best friend.